A Message on Body Positivity.

March 03, 2014

I was born a standard edition human, two eyes, ten toes, most things working and running smoothly.

Then I grew, as most people do. I grew with the stature and structure I inherited genetically. I got my fathers broad shoulders and muscular limbs. I got my mother's facial shape and curly hair. I nourished my body with the food I was given, and had a little excess from the treats I snuck and the nights I was allowed dessert.

As I grew, I was exposed to advertisements, magazines, television shows, and the like, but it wasn't until the 7th grade that I began to compare myself to them. This happened when I started to have feelings for a boy. The boy's friends told me that he would like only me if I looked like "insert unrealistic female video game character here."

This bothered me. It angered me. I had no desire to look like that character. I was myself, and if that guy didn't like me for me, he wasn't worth it. I wasn't going to grow cantaloupe sized breasts overnight, and I certainly wasn't going to have blonde hair, blue eyes, or a disproportionately small waist, like ever.

I didn't want to become another person, but I did envy the bold sexiness of the Victoria's Secret models, and the seemingly effortless beauty of the 11th graders I saw walking to class.  I daydreamed about becoming that sultry, glamorous woman that lured men in with just a glance.

But the thing is, with exceptions of brothers and sisters, everyone comes from different cloth. Different parents with different features. This huge mixing bowl of different traits and colors and body parts. If no one could possibly be the same, why are we expected, or why do we even want to fit into a particular mold?

I am 5 foot 7, which considered "average" is also relatively tall for a female. My body proportions and stature also make me appear taller than I actually am. I have broad shoulders and hips. I have muscular arms and legs. I have some meat on my bones. I love to exercise, but it's not something I do every day. I do my best to eat right because it makes me feel good. I indulge sometimes, as everyone should.

My weight fluctuates. I make no excuses for this. It happens. It may get on my nerves from time to time, but it doesn't change who I am. I have scars, I have dimples, I have places that jiggle. I have things I love. I have insecurities.

I am different from every other person I've met, and so are you.
Your stature is your stature, and your weight is your weight. Blame is useless. Love who you are now.

It shouldn't be common practice to be compared to others in terms of pounds and inches and sizes when we all came from different material. You don't compare the width of an apple to the height of an orange, do you? Then why should the thick waist of one compare to the toned abs of another?

If you're feeling blue about a particular feature, remember that you have it for a reason. This isn't about being male or female, or skinny or fat. Your body takes care of you, it nourishes and protects you, it's the reason you think and breathe and bend. Take time to appreciate it, now rather than later. Ideal weights may come and go, you will change and so will I.

By all means, work to be the best version of yourself that you can become, but much of that is an internal and spiritual battle as opposed to a physical one. You don't have to love every inch of yourself at any given time, we all have our days, but make sure, if you want to change, that you do it out of love.

How do you show your body love?
What is your idea of "body positive?"

4 comments

  1. You know I've been insecure about my body for a long time and it strikes me when people say they want the 'hourglass' figure.I have that body shape and it's a bitch.It's hard to maintain a certain wight and I sometimes feel like guys won't like me because I have a big bum but then I realize I don't care and I've grown more confident about my body.

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  2. I think I just got exhausted of my own insecurities. Not being satisfied with our body image can be very tiring. And I looove to eat ahah! Bodies are bodies, no matter how they look. As long as there's health, fuck the rest. Kudos to this post :)

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  3. I like to follow plus size models so I remember beautiful women are in all sizes.

    Well-written blog :)

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